Rationality witticisms suitable for t-shirts or bumper stickers

What are your best short witticisms, suitable for use on a t-shirt, bumper sticker, or similar location? Ideally something that might make someone reading it think, or get curious enough to ask about it. Simple in-group identification is fine too, though.

For context, therufs is spending today at the NC Maker Faire making t-shirts, and asked me for suggestions this morning. As I was still mostly asleep, I wasn't very helpful.

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Someone write a script to sort comments in Rationality Quotes threads by net karma per character!

I did exactly that after looking at this thread, and only spotted your comment when I wanted to post the results.

I skipped some obvious refinements as this was a 5 minute project.

  • 55 A Bet is a Tax on Bullshit. Alex Tabarrok
  • 45 Luck is statistics taken personally. Penn Jellete
  • 33 Comic Quote Minus 37 -- Ryan Armand Also a favourite.
  • 34 Nobody is smart enough to be wrong all the time.Ken Wilber
  • 32 A problem well stated is a problem half solved.Charles Kettering
  • 48 I will not procrastinate regarding any ritual granting immortality. --Evil Overlord List #230
  • 29 The greatest weariness comes from work not done.-Eric Hoffer
  • 26 "Most haystacks do not even have a needle." -- Lorenzo
  • 24 "I accidentally changed my mind." my four-year-old
  • 31 Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd. Voltaire
  • 39 People say "think outside the box," as if the box wasn't a fucking great idea.Sean Thomason
  • 38 The Noah principle: predicting rain doesn’t count, building arks does. -Warren E. Buffett
  • 37 It’s easy to lie with statistics, but it’s easier to lie without them. -Fred Mosteller
  • 30 If one does not know to which port one is sailing, no wind is favorable.-Seneca
  • 34 It is the mark of a truly intelligent person to be moved by statistics.George Bernard Shaw
  • 34 "Working in mysterious ways" is the greatest euphemism for failure ever devised.TheTweetOfGod
  • 12 Death is the gods' crime. Unsounded
  • 24 The most practical thing in the world is a good theory. Helmholtz
  • 29 When the facts change, I change my mind. What do you do, sir? John Maynard Keynes
  • 28 Writing program code is a good way of debugging your thinking. -- Bill Venables
  • 28 It is easy to be certain....One has only to be sufficiently vague.Charles S. Peirce
  • 30 Truth is much too complicated to allow anything but approximations. — John Von Neumann
  • 31 There is one rule that's very simple, but not easy: observe reality and adjust. Ran Prieur
  • 21 Things are only impossible until they're not. -- Jean-Luc Picard
  • 24 Part of the potential of things is how they break. Vi Hart, How To Snakes
  • 25 A scholar is just a library’s way of making another library. Daniel Dennett
  • 29 We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it. Mark Twain
  • 29 The Company that needs a new machine tool is already paying for it. -old Warner Swasey ad
  • 25 "Any sufficiently analyzed magic is indistinguishable from SCIENCE!" ~Girl Genius
  • 26 Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers. — Grossman's Law
  • 22 Most people would rather die than think; many do. – Bertrand Russell
  • 22 The only road to doing good shows, is doing bad shows.Louis C.K., on Reddit
  • 28 My brain technically-not-a-lies to me far more than it actually lies to me.-- Aristosophy (again)
  • 23 The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off. Gloria Steinem
  • 27 Nature draws no line between living and nonliving. -- K. Eric Drexler, Engines of Creation
  • 22 It is better to destroy one's own errors than those of others. Democritus
  • 12 Reality is not optional. Thomas Sowell
  • 17 Statistics is applied philosophy of science. A. P. Dawid
  • 22 Forget Jesus. The stars died so that you could be here today. Lawrence Krauss
  • 23 Go down deep enough into anything and you will find mathematics. Dean Schlicter
  • 24 We are built to be effective animals, not happy ones. -Robert Wright, The Moral Animal
  • 19 Being right too soon is socially unacceptable. Robert A. Heinlein
  • 14 "Anything you can do, I can do meta" -Rudolf Carnap
  • 17 Mind is a machine for jumping to conclusions - Daniel Kahneman
  • 26 A faith which cannot survive collision with the truth is not worth many regrets.Arthur C. Clarke
  • 26 Nobody panics when things go "according to plan"… even if the plan is horrifying. The Joker
  • 23 "Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies." --Friedrich Nietzsche
  • 20 I honestly don't know. Let's see what happens. -- Hans. The Troll Hunter
  • 16 Luck is opportunity plus preparation plus luck.--Jane Espenson
  • 20 The singularity is my retirement plan. -- tocomment, in a Hacker News post
  • 19 Better our hypotheses die for our errors than ourselves. -- Karl Popper
  • 22 Errors using inadequate data are much less than those using no data at all.-Charles Babbage
  • 19 In general, we are least aware of what our minds do best. — Marvin Minsky
  • 20 It is easier to love humanity than to love one's neighbor.--Eric Hoffer, on Near/Far
  • 15 Keep your solutions close, and your problems closer.afoolswisdom
  • 18 "If God gives you lemons, you find a new God."-- Powerthirst 2: Re-Domination
  • 17 Truth comes out of error more easily than out of confusion.-Francis Bacon
  • 23 Opening your eyes doesn't make a bad picture worse. http://onefte.com/2011/07/17/bully-for-you/
  • 19 Know the hair you have to get the hair you want. -Pantene Pro-V hair care bottle
  • 16 The best way to escape from a problem is to solve it. -Alan Saporta
  • 16 Not to know is bad; not to wish to know is worse. — Wolof proverb
  • 20 Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities. -- Voltaire

The ones I find most T-shirtable are “Most haystacks do not even have a needle”, “Things are only impossible until they're not”, “The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off”, “Reality is not optional”, and “The best way to escape from a problem is to solve it.”

(Note how the first two send apparently contradictory messages. The next twos seem to be variations on the Litany of Gendlin; they remind of something I've read somewhere, “Deal with reality or reality will deal with you.”)

If we're looking for a short, pithy statement which signals affiliation with the Less Wrong meme cluster, I think the standing all-time top rationality quote is a good place to start.

Personally, I've been hearing all my life about the Serious Philosophical Issues posed by life extension, and my attitude has always been that I'm willing to grapple with those issues for as many centuries as it takes.

-- Patrick Nielsen Hayden

I think you should not try to promote rationality this way. It's tacky (it's bad signaling (the reference class becomes all the other things which are promoted this way)).

I don't think wearing slogans on shirts is much of a way to promote anything. It's a signal of affiliation. Shirt slogans don't change people's minds, but they can help like-minded people recognize each other and view each other favorably.

Plus, as time goes on, the reference class of things which are promoted on shirts gets closer and closer to being all-inclusive.

I didn't really have "promoting rationality" in mind; when I'm shirtmaking and not pressed for time, I aim most for "wearable and accurate self-expression", followed by "maybe eliciting a flash of recognition from a very tiny percentage of people who see the shirt".

For my own purposes, the ideal respondant to this prompt would have to be able to read my mind and see what I overlook, but any luminous aspiring rationalist might also be able to provide insight.

PQWAK.

Personally, when I encounter a difficulty, I say to myself, "This wouldn't stop Akemi Homura."

Personally, when I encounter a difficulty, I say to myself, "This wouldn't stop Akemi Homura."

If you fire Akemi Homura at an immovable object, the object retroactively disappears.

Because "If you fire Akemi Homura at an immovable object, you miss" just doesn't sound impressive.

Which is a shame; aesthetically I like your version better.

Um.. I feel like I'm in the out-group now. What does this (and the stuff below) mean?

You've seen/heard about the What Would Jesus Do thing, yes? This is that but with references to the Harry Potter as a Rationalist fanfic Yudkowsky is doing.

What Would Harry James Potter-Evans-Verres Do

What Would Professor Quirrel Do

Professor Quirrel Would Avada Kevadra (the Killing Curse, very efficient for removal of obstacles :P)

"Keep calm and apply Bayes' Rule" below a Tudor crown logo.

I'm wondering if pictures vs text-only makes a difference in how effectively a t-shirt will prompt questions or conversations.

Also, whether the class of which the above is an instance - hitching a ride on an already well-known meme - wins over originality.

Wish someone would run a proper experiment :)

Wearing clothes with slogans written on them is a bad idea socially. It is quite unlikely that anyone will ask you about it, and even less likely that such an interaction will result in any good. All the negative social effects are likely to overshadow the few positive encounters you may have. Even if you wear the clothes with the slogan in the appropriate social context, like a Less Wrong meetup, they don't add any value.

If you wanted to talk to someone about rationality, what do you think would help more in impressing them: a rationalist wearing normal, stylish clothes, or a rationalist wearing a t shirt with a slogan printed on it?

It is difficult to explain why clothes (or vehicles) with slogans printed on them are bad for you. If it helps, consider that the vast majority of people you see outside are not wearing clothes with witticisms, they have all decided that it is not beneficial. The exceptions are mainly religious, political, and other extremists.

I think this depends very much on your social circle and social goals. Wearing clothing with slogans on it is a high variance strategy: high attractiveness to a few people, low or even negative attractiveness to others. Wearing slogan-less clothing is more low variance; probably no one will object, but likely none of your responses will be as positive as the maximum positive response from wearing a T-shirt with a slogan on it. Both strategies can be useful, depending on what you are trying to accomplish.

Personally, I wear shirts with nerdy slogans on them, and anecdotally have had several positive interactions with people who came up to me to say "I like your shirt." (And I doubt I've lost much by turning people off.)

Also, I'm unconvinced that, in a casual context, wearing a shirt with a slogan on it is as negative as you suggest. I see people wearing shirts with slogans I don't get all the time, and I think I just ignore them, or occasionally ask what they mean (which rarely gets me very far conversation-wise, but doesn't cause me to dislike the person).

On the other hand, if you're trying to project an aura of Serious Grownup, it's probably a bad idea.

EDIT: Unless you're talking about shirts with controversial slogans, I suppose. That's even more high-variance, but again, in some contexts could still be a good idea. (I was thinking of things like "Engineering: It's like math, but louder.")

Shirts I've gotten comments on that I took as positive:

  • "When all else fails, send in the Wookiee."
  • A shirt with the Mortal Kombat logo. My father and I have identical shirts; his got someone in a Bst-Buy to chase him down and ask if he could have it. Mine has gotten positive comments from older Chinese women and Tai Chi practicianers.
  • "Those who pretend they know everything annoy those of us who do." This one tends to get reactions every time I wear it.
  • My Green Lantern shirt has gotten a reaction or two.

But I'm also quite certain that context matters. Family, polite old ladies, nerds (of varying extremes), and Chinese people tend to be the majority of people I interacted with once I got to eighth grade and my anti-idiot filters successfully limited my interactions with anyone else. (Nowadays it's just family, but I've gone into that elsewhere.) I'm sure an "Of course I care! That's why I'm calculating probabilities!" would get (mostly neutral or positive) reactions, but how that translates into real world applications I can only imagine (I physically cannot read body language and a non-negligible number of people might be artificially polite to me because of my eyes).

It is difficult to explain why clothes (or vehicles) with slogans printed on them are bad for you.

On many occasions "difficult to explain" turns out to be a hint for "not actually true".

the vast majority of people you see outside are not wearing clothes with witticisms

Indeed. The vast majority are wearing clothes bearing advertisement for various brands. I would think twice before concluding that they have decided that is beneficial.

I would think twice before concluding that they have decided that is beneficial.

I dunno. Brands can be a pretty effective status symbol. (That reasoning might not be explicit, though.)

If you wanted to talk to someone about rationality, what do you think would help more in impressing them: a rationalist wearing normal, stylish clothes, or a rationalist wearing a t shirt with a slogan printed on it?

In impressing them? Probably the former, unless the slogan happens to strike them as clever.

In bringing me to their attention and encouraging them to approach me in a crowd full of people wearing normal stylish clothes and T-shirts with non/anti-rationalist slogans? Undoubtedly the latter.

In encouraging them to approach me in a crowd full of people wearing T-shirts with rationalist slogans? It's very hard to say, I don't expect either to have much effect there..

What do you expect in those scenarios?

Impressing, persuading - the difference between these is mostly insignificant when dealing with non-rationalists. I chose the word due to my belief that rational argument is an inefficient method for spreading rationality. If you encounter a non-rationalist, you may rationally explain him why rationality is great, but if you leave a good impression on an emotional level, he'll probably remember the lesson about rationality much longer. Ideally we probably want to do both. Arguing people into changing their way of thinking is vastly more difficult than creating in them a desire to change. This tends to be supported by studies in psychology - people are much more likely to do things and be happy about it when their own brain gets to explain why they are doing it.

A practical example of this would be a popular movie star speaking about rationality on Oprah. Regardless of what the star said, interest in rationality would almost certainly increase, and so would the average level of rationality, even if slightly. (If the star spoke well, the effect would be larger, of course.) I'm quite certain that this would have a much larger effect on spreading rationality than having someone in a t-shirt make an argument about rationality in front of the same amount of viewers.

How many Less Wrong users have become more rational, not because of any rational arguments they read, but because they were impressed by Yudkowsky or someone else? I'll be the first to admit that being impressed by the people here was a significant factor in getting me to study rationality in more depth.

Getting people to change their ways of thinking is extremely difficult. I say that wearing a dorky T-shirt while attempting this will only make the task more difficult.

I'm not optimizing my clothing for the vast majority of people, and neither should most lesswrongers.

Maybe mugs would work better than t-shirts for some environments.

Fortunately, I keep a quotefile for just such an occasion. Here are some of the pithier entries:

Peace if possible, truth at all costs. -- Martin Luther

Trust, but verify -- Russian saying

Live forever or die trying

I intend to live forever. So far, so good. -- Rick Potvin

Give me immortality or death. -- Nick de Jongh

"I'm not a psychopath, I'm just very creative"

TANSTAAFL -- Heinlein

What you don't know will kill you. -- The Cynic's Book of Wisdom

Half of knowledge is knowing the questions. -- The Cynic's Book of Wisdom

Look behind the curtain. -- The Cynic's Book of Wisdom

Plus a couple of my personal favorites:

Why should I believe that?

Then again, I could be wrong.

"I'm not a psychopath, I'm just very creative"

For the love of God, don't put this on a shirt, especially if a male is going to wear it at some point.

But it provides useful information about the person wearing the shirt!

Peace if possible, truth at all costs. -- Martin Luther

The fact that he started some really bloody wars over something that didn't even turn out to be true should maybe give us some pause before we endorse virtues like this.

What do you think you know, and how do you think you know it?

All syllogisms have three parts, therefore this is not a syllogism

American Non-Sequitur Society--We don't make sense, but we do like pizza

Any slogan simple enough to fit on a bumper sticker is too simple to do any good

Ask me about my vow of silence

Circular Definition: see Circular Definition

Circular logic is self-validating. Therefore, it is correct.

Does this program halt?

I shouldn't make sweeping generalizations, but we all do it.....

I think my brain has a mind of its own

If I'd known grandchildren would be so much fun, I would have had them first

If if' statements had nothen' clauses,

If there were no rhetorical questions, what would we do with our hypothetical answers?

If words could speak, I wonder what they'd say

If you don't go to other people's funerals, they won't go to yours

I've got nothing to say--don't make me say it twice

The map is not the territory, but you can't fold up the territory and put it in your glove compartment

Objectivity is in the eye of the beholder

Practice atheism, the religion of the gods!

The Theorem Theorem: If if, then then

What color is a chameleon on a mirror? The same color as the chameleon on the other side of the mirror

What do you look like when you aren't visualizing anything?

What do you mean, YOU'RE a solipsist?

Which came first, the future or the past?

Why did Douglas Hofstadter cross the road? To make this riddle possible

Yes, but what if this weren't a rhetorical question?

What part of gestalt didn't you understand?

The Two Rules 1) Don't tell people everything you know

I went on a nostalgia trip. It wasn't as good as it will be.

Universal Solvent Corporation, Container Research Division

The invisible and the non-existent often look very much alike

because circular reasoning works [wrapped around into a circle]

NO MEMES! Pass it on

Circular reasoning fails because [wraps around in a circle]

Omt ndlss vwls

Circular reasoning working because circular reasoning fails because.... [wrapped around in an infinity sign]

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

I will not violate causality yesterday

Contrary to Occam's Razor, patients can have as many diseases as they damn well please.

I'm so Meta, Even This Acronym

If you use a slippery slope argument once, you'll use it for everything

Who are you to question why your god doesn't want me to believe in him?


And here's one that people are likely to ask about: The voices in my head are SATB.